Monday, March 20, 2006

INTERVENTION

Crazy ladies have 1000 cats, right? You're NOT crazy if you DON'T have 1000 cats, right? It's OKAY if, instead of cats, you have 1000 BOXES OF CHEERIOS OR CHEERIO-TYPE CEREALS, right?!

This is not a hypothetical question.

I think have a problem.

I can't stop buying/storing/eating Cheerios or Cheerio-type cereals. Today I purchased a brand new box of Honey Nut Cheerios at Duane Reade for the bargain price of $3.99. That is a good deal in this town. I have been eating this box, in milk-moistened and dry varieties, ALL DAY. I swear to God a single Cheerio just rolled out of my sleeve. And I pulverized another single Cheerio with the heel of my boot a little while ago. It was an accident, little guy.

Meanwhile, I just bought Trader Joe's brand Honey-O's TWO DAYS AGO. And I have a half-eaten box of Healthy-O's from Whole Foods sitting in my pantry. And last night I ate some Golden Grahams. I know those aren't Cheerio's, but ARE THEY NOT A GATEWAY CEREAL TO HARDER grahams/pops/flakes?

I have a problem. And I am asking for help.

6 Comments:

Blogger crabbydad said...

There is only one thing that can save you from a certain CheeriOverdose. This is it:

http://www.mannaharvest.net/images/1421/52089C.gif

Though the only way to get off the "Bumpers" is methadone.

9:32 PM  
Blogger garin said...

Got the computer for a couple of seconds(told my friend(superbestfriend) we were having an on-line intervention for an alcholic friend!!!looks like the syptoms are much worse though!!) Look I'm a combat-medic and if your not grinding these up and snorting them I think you'll be allright, We all have our obsession and we all have our quirky likes and habbits, your cereal love and obession is who you are, don't change that!! but I hear ceral's twice as good with milk,just a rumor.. gotta go some dude(certinly not a "superbestfriend) says he needs the computer to talk to his "pregent"wife..but between you and me she's been pregent for about 4 years now!!! hope we helped.. your iraqi friends(aka the superbestfriends)

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