QUERO MEU BIFE MAL PASSADO

This post is all about meat, because I am infatuated with meat. I was going to qualify "infatuated" with "slightly" but then I thought the adverb would read like an apology and I am not sorry for my obsession.

I decided to write about meat today because of some music I've been listening to also unapologetically obsessively, and that music is Battles. Their record Mirrored is like The Greatest Thing I Have Listened To In Quite Some Time and I would already like to declare it Best Album 2007. That shit is amazing and the reason it is part of this entry is because listening to it makes me want to consume the flesh of a fresh-killed animal and eat it with my bare hands. I know that sounds crazy but listen to it and then tell me it doesn't kind of make your mouth water for Something!

Because I live in a time and place where eating the meat of a fresh-killed animal with my bare hands is not exactly convenient, I am doing the Next Best Thing: I am going to Carne Vale to eat as much Meat-On-A-Stick as I possibly can. Carne Vale is a Brazilian rodizio on B between 3rd and 4th and it is sick. For $35 you get a ridiculous amount of meat delivered (by metal stick, sim) and sliced (by metal knife, double sim) to your table, never mind the salad bar, sides, and dessert, which are good but ultimately irrelevant. Yes, it's a Flesh Feast at Carne Vale, in this case a charred Flesh Feast of so many anonymous cows and steers, their bodies divided into rib eyes, filets, prime ribs, skirt and flank steaks, short ribs, sirloins, not to mention the anonymous baby lambs, and also some extra-anonymous sausage/turkey/chicken selects that I'll be ignoring. When you think about all those lost animal souls, $35 is a retarded bargain. Especially in this town, I mean are you kidding me?